imo--it goes back to my description of a freak...it all depends on 'your' level of sexual comfort. if including multiple people in your sexual escapades is normal to you--then multiple partners does not make you a freak, but if its not normal for you and you are stepping outside your "sexual boundaries" then, yes it could be considered freaky behavior for you. if its within your boundaries/norm then maybe its just a creative twist on what's normal.
i think for the majority of people (and this is just my thinking--and some people on aa.org have made this thought process easier to prove from the positions they've taken on ideas posted here--) voyeruism and multiple partners can be considered more freaky than creative.
anyone else??
The wise woman wishes to be no one's enemy, the wise woman refuses to be anyone's victim. -Maya Angelou
Seems like there should be some standard measure of this. It's like "hot" or "cold". While perception may determine one's personal comfort with a particular temperature, there are still generally established norms about what is considered what. No?
Otherwise nibbling on your partners ear might be considered "freaky" for someone?
just like Justice Stevens{ or was it Blackman? } said about pornoggraphy-- it's hard to define, but i know it when i see it. That's the way freakiness is. And, just like MBM said, there is a meter, in most 'normal' brains that tells us that ear nibbling is normal and multiple partners isn't. Oh yea, i forgot to say that this is IMO
I can't disagree more with the concept that freakiness is all a matter of your personal comfort and that if including a certain sexual act is within your comfort zone, then you are not being freaky. Think about that for one minute.Being freaky is deviating from the established norm. Most folks do this from time to time and are proud of it. But some people don't just deviate-- they are recognized deviants. They live there. {members of man/boy clubs, the incestuous, the 'swingers' -- well, you get my point}. But, they too, would say that they are just a little freaky. They would be the first to say "normal to one may not be normal to all. Let's just respect each others' freakiness." Everyone here recognizes that the above is so freaky that it crosses the line into sick/deviant behavior. There IS a line and everyone draws it somewhere. I think it's called a freak-o-meter and some folks/some acts are just way off of the scale. Don't you think? And if you do agree that your own personal comfort can not define freakiness, then what do you think does define it?When does freakydeaky become a perversion?
quote:Originally posted by Faith: Being freaky is deviating from the established norm. Most folks do this from time to time and are proud of it. But some people don't just deviate-- they are recognized deviants. They live there.
So I take it you have been an average, C student, 100 IQ person your whole life and are proud of it? Since you fear "deviating" from the norm?
they too, would say that they are just a little freaky. They would be the first to say "normal to one may not be normal to all. Let's just respect each others' freakiness."
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Everyone here recognizes that the above is so freaky that it crosses the line into sick/deviant behavior. And if you do agree that your own personal comfort can not define freakiness, then what do you think does define it? When does freakydeaky become a perversion?
first...i disagree with your comments that deviants say they are "a little freaky". I know people who fit your description of deviance (members of sex clubs and what not) and they recognize their "deviance". They KNOW they are way beyond the norm and they don't impose their ways on anyone uncomfortable with it. To me they are freaky...not deviant.
second...are you saying shy's behavior crosses the line into sick/deviant? who decided that--you? and why? to me her behavior is personal--and freaky..not sick or deviant.
freakiness has to be defined individually or by the group you associate with.
take this example--a master (sex master) with slaves (sex slaves) who live together as roommates to those who view them from the outside world (normal)--but to those who know them, and know what their roles are within the house--they are freaks. Their behavior may be considered devient by people who register LOW on the freak-o-meter/or people who just dont feel comfortable pushing any sexual envelope at all...but by others who register HIGHER on that meter their behavior might be a little further out there, but definately not perverse or deviant.
so again, how you view someone else's escapades all depends on where you are in your own comfort.
an Amish couple might think sleeping together naked is deviant and perverse...but hopefully all of us here are at least comfortable enough to take our clothes off when we climb in bed. but maybe not, i know women who never remove their nightclothes. its all up to the individual.
You mean there are people that sleep with clothes on.... now that is not normal... there is definitely something wrong with them
Case in point: Its all relative to who we are NOW.
Fine line: Force upon another who does not wish to participate and seduction/molestation of children. Everything else between consenting adults, no matter how repulsive it may seem to you or I, with time becomes accepted or unaccepted, as the group consciousness of the world changes. And for alot of people to have so called deviant activities, the group more or less accepts it and continues to contribute to its existence. Now about them night clothes... nekkid... Mmmm and a warm body right next to you. Snuggly close... Nothing better!
La FemmeNkechi
quote:Be the change in the world you want to see
- Think about the effects even your smallest actions have on the world. You are often a part of the problem. Stop pointing fingers, accept responsibility and be a part of the solution. Create your higher self!
HUH??? Nykki- i think that you misinterpreted something;because, I did not state or imply that Shy1 was deviant. But, to one of your points about truly deviant folks knowing that they are deviant, I have to disagree-- or shall i say instead that i just have had other experiences than you. I know plenty of over the top people, including psychotic folks, who have no idea that what they are doing is crazy or right or wrong. I know plenty of folks who rationalize their own deviance away, and even try to turn things around to imply that those who are 'normal' are somehow deviant- prude-like, uptight, etc. Do you know anyone like this? Anyway, just sharing my opinions and experiences and trying to define the limits of freakiness as it encroaches upon perversion. No more than that.
faith, i didn't misinterprete anything. i asked a question based on a comment in your post.
i asked -- are you saying shy's behavior crosses the line into sick/deviant?
because of this comment-- Everyone here recognizes that the above is so freaky that it crosses the line into sick/deviant behavior.
no assumptions, no misinterpretation--just a simply question of your statement to have you clarify what you meant.
"truly deviant folks knowing that they are deviant" ; "psychotic folks, who have no idea that what they are doing is crazy or right or wrong"
the conversation so far has been about SEXUAL OPENESS, FREAKINESS, EXPRESSIVNESS...not about clinical deviance, or people with psychosis. the sexually "over the top" people i know are not deviant people, they are business men, executives, etc. they enjoy sexually deviant (beyond the norm) behavior with others who enjoy the same.
"they rationalize their own deviance away, and even try to turn things around to imply that those who are 'normal' are somehow deviant- prude-like, uptight, etc"
and i guess those "normal" people rationalize they're normalcy so that they can turn things around on the more free people and call them "deviant"...know anyone like this?
Nykki- what you misinterpretted was the word "above". The "above" that i was referring to was members of man/boy clubs, incestuous relationships and swingers. So, again, i don't know what you were inferring about Shy1, but it had nothing to do with what i was talking about. For my part, i do realize that this thread started out to be about normal{there i go again with that word!}freaky behavior, but i decided to broaden the issue to include extreme 'freaks'/psychos, to see whether or not perverts can be seen as part of a continuum, or if they are a separate entity all together. LaFemme answered with her opinion about the fine line between them. Anyone else want to jump in {besides Nykki}?
