Why Good Men Behave Badly by Clinical Psychologist, David Wexler, Ph.D

Book Description
When the emotional demands of your relationship become too much to deal with, how do you respond? The premise of this book is that good, well-intentioned men can, in times of stress and emotional conflict, act in destructive ways that don't reflect their true character. From a humanistic and empathetic perspective, this book explores the latest research about male psychological development to develop a new, compassionate narrative for the struggles men face. Learn to recognize and label your internal states.

Find out why displays of "not-so-masculine" emotions are so difficult to deal with, and why they can provoke episodes of problematic behavior. Explore the father-son relationship and the reality of male peer relations; see why these patterned interactions can reinforce bad behavior from generation to generation. Structured exercises and strategies help transfer the concepts of the book into daily experience.

Find out why displays of "not-so-masculine" emotions are so difficult to deal with, and why they can provoke episodes of problematic behavior. Explore the father-son relationship and the reality of male peer relations; see why these patterned interactions can reinforce bad behavior from generation to generation. Structured exercises and strategies help transfer the concepts of the book into daily experience.

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CHAPTER OUTLINE

1. Good Men & Broken Mirrors
2. The Power Of Women
3. Mid-Life, Affairs, & Projections
4. Fathers: Then & Now
5. Men's Brains
6. Odysseus, Relational Heroism, & Imaginary Crimes
7. Guy Talk: Speaking The Language Of Men
8. What Women Can Do

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN

1. Learn about the three conditions leading to deficits in male emotional intelligence and relationship competence–and what to do about them:
Many men have difficulty recognizing and labeling internal states.

2. Many men easily become "emotionally flooded" in the face of not-so-masculine emotions.

3. Men are prone to either take action or escape in the face of uncomfortable experiences.

4. Learn about the particular power that men ascribe to women, particularly through a detailed discussion of the "broken mirror" phenomenon.

5. Explore the father-son relationship and the reality of male peer relations, and see why these patterned reactions can reinforce bad behavior from generation to generation.

6. Use structured exercises and strategies to help transfer the concepts of the book into daily experience.

7. Using a relentlessly humanistic and empathic perspective, a wide range of examples from the therapist's office and from the popular media, and the latest research about male psychological development, learn how to develop a new and more compassionate narrative for relationship struggles.

8. Learn specific guidelines for women to help distinguish good-hearted men from dangerous ones, guidelines on how to help bring out the good man in him, and tips on how to raise boys to be good men.

9. Understand research about the male brain and male neuropsychological functioning which is often maladaptive for the demands of modern relationships.

10. Become inspired by example after example of male success stories in relationships and of the "soft underbellies" of even the most defended men.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

David B. Wexler, Ph.D., is the founder and executive director of the Relationship Training Institute in San Diego, an organization designed to help relationships in conflict. The California Psychological Association has honored Dr. Wexler with the Distinguished Contribution to Psychology award. He is also the author of several books, including Domestic Violence 2000 and The Adolescent Self.

Drawing on hundreds of interviews with men about their relationships and twenty years of experience in the field, Dr. Wexler helps men (and the women who love them) understand how even good men often damage healthy intimate relationships because they are unable to recognize and express their emotions. He offers a wide range of strategies for how "real men" can transcend this conditioning and do it differently.

Why read the book? David Wexler just inked a deal for his own TV series.