I'm serious... This question is for those who believe in Marriage and desire it for themselves some day...

1. Too many available women that will let you have them without commitment?

2. You believe, the woman you want is not black? or doesn't exist in America?

3. Career first?

4. Someone broke your heart?

5. Still smarting over the one that got away?

6. Uncertain if you are capable of being faithful?

7. You want marriage, you just don't trust women so you live in limbo?


what? none of these? some of these? combination of these? which combination? what did I miss?

10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies...

I haven't found a virtuous woman. I fear that anything less for me, would be settling. I settle for many things, but a woman can't be one of them. She is for life.

I guess you'd have to DEFINE "virtuous" Heru..

I used to be on the BlackChristianPeople meet personals and every other woman had a screen name of "virtuousister10" and "virtous4You" and "realwomanofVIRTUE"..

So I started asking them (the dozens of them) why so many were divorced, unmarried (never married) with 3 and 4 children, overweight, impatient, inarticulate, immodest (you shoulda seen some of those photos out there) and stank. (Some of the profiles were the most bitter and nasty and negative things you'd ever want to see)

The reason I'm not married is because I'm not ready yet, and the people I've encountered were not ready either, and that's okay.

I don't date around, I live alone and don't entertain women in my home much (if ever) and I love my space.

I'm working on two certifications, a career change (field change altogether which requires more schooling), trying to get myself together to compete in a 40+ bodybuilding competition, and taking care of my 85 year old mother, keep up with my 14 year old daughter, and try to remain yoked up with my spiritual family for accountabilities sake.

I'm on here (AA) during downtime because this, outside of the bodybuilding forums, is where I've chosen as my home.

Outside of that, I must say that a woman who:

Traditionally black
Is spiritually and emotionally mature
Righteous without shame
Fit and healthy and incorporates as a big part of her lifestyle with the evidence being in how she looks with her clothes ON and off.
Over 30 years old
Loves men, especially me..

Can get holla all day.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: THEBIGDODDY,

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I don't believe that for a minute!

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

I'm serious... This question is for those who believe in Marriage and desire it for themselves some day...

1. Too many available women that will let you have them without commitment?
Quantity but not a lot of Quality

2. You believe, the woman you want is not black? or doesn't exist in America?
Of course she will be of African decent, im sure she is out there , just havent met her yet


3. Career first?
No, but will continue to build myself up and when we do cross paths, I will be ready in all aspects

4. Someone broke your heart?

I have been betrayed and dissapointed, but not broken hearted, my heart is as strong passionate and loving as ever, just too experienced to be taking for a ride, lol


5. Still smarting over the one that got away?

No I dont believe I met the one for me yet

6. Uncertain if you are capable of being faithful?
being faithfull is not the issue, having a quality woman to invest in is the challenge

7. You want marriage, you just don't trust women so you live in limbo?
Not saying I dont trust women, I give everyone the benifit of the doubt, I let their actions speak. I would rather have a woman that knows and values a marriage, and not one who sees marriage as a business partnership and me as a longterm roommate

quote:

Originally posted by Santana St. Cloud:
If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

What does that mean?

Peace....

Thank you gentlemen for your responses thus far....

My questions were sincere...

I'm just listening...




Salaam....

quote:

Originally posted by THEBIGDODDY:

quote:

Originally posted by Santana St. Cloud:
If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

What does that mean?

I took that to mean that if life is good without a spouse, why throw marriage into the equation? The only reason that I am responding for SSC is because when I read that sentence I could totally relate.

Some people shouldnt get married, men and women!!

I think we invest too much time looking for either Mr./Ms.Right and often bypass Mr./Ms.Okay.

i'm happily single

quote:

Originally posted by zodo:
I think we invest too much time looking for either Mr./Ms.Right and often bypass Mr./Ms.Okay.

Or maybe people spend too much time looking for society's definition of Mr./Ms. right instead of focusing on finding someone who is right for them.

quote:

Originally posted by zodo:
I think we invest too much time looking for either Mr./Ms.Right and often bypass Mr./Ms.Okay.

You really think so? Why would you marry someone you're just lukewarm about?

quote:

Originally posted by Khalliqa:

quote:

Originally posted by zodo:
I think we invest too much time looking for either Mr./Ms.Right and often bypass Mr./Ms.Okay.

You really think so? Why would you marry someone you're just lukewarm about?

My dear their are 52 billions separate reasons why people marry. "LUKEWARM" is usually a precursor to things getting "HOT" and then again we'll have to examine the "age demographic": older unmarried people are less likely to be too choosy in selecting a mate to them, I guess, companionship is better than loneliness.

I must say it's really heart-warming to see that all of the answers thusfar seem to fall into the "none of the above" category!

quote:

Originally posted by zodo:
My dear their are 52 billions separate reasons why people marry. "LUKEWARM" is usually a precursor to things getting "HOT" and then again we'll have to examine the "age demographic": older unmarried people are less likely to be too choosy in selecting a mate to them, I guess, companionship is better than loneliness.

Hmm...

Thanks for answering....