A friend emailed this poem I would like to share. Pass it on.

*********************

TO ALL U BROTHAS I SAUTE U AND ALL U SISTAS LOOK CLOSER TO WHAT U HAVE MAY GOD BLESS US ALL

Good Black Men are indeed all around us. We pass them on the streets, in
the malls, and at work. Most we can't see because we don't know what a
'good man' really looks like. He usually isn't flashy enough or rich
enough to turn our heads. He might not wear a suit or push a Lexus. He
might not have a body like Tyson with a Denzel face.
But, as you mature, you (should) realize it's better to find someone
who's got your back rather than someone who turns your head.

A good black man doesn't agree whole-heartedly with everything you
say. He doesn't just tell you what you want to hear and do the opposite.
He doesn't declare how sensitive, sweet, caring, sincere, etc. he is (he
won't have to because it shows). He has his own opinions and yours may
clash, but he doesn't have to degrade you to prove he's right . He even
admits at times to being wrong, especially if you are willing to do the
same.

A good black man is not going to meet every item on your checklist. He
is human with frailties and faults mixed in with all of his wonderful,
strong attributes. He needs your love and respect. He needs to feel that
you don't live to catch him doing something wrong so you can declare,
'Aha! I knew you were a dog!'

A good black man isn't insecure about his woman having great
achievements. In fact, he is her number one supporter and becomes
disappointed with her when she begins to lose herself, especially for
the sake of not hurting his feelings, or only wanting to make him happy.
His happiness comes with seeing her excel in her dreams and
accomplishing her goals. For as she excels and is exalted, a good woman
will bring her good man right along with her.
A good black man doesn't necessarily give you a huge birthday or
Valentine's gift. He shows his love in the ways that are comfortable to
him. Don't judge him by TV standards.

No one is really living a fairy tale. You'll miss out on your own fairy
tale by buying into the myth that our men are no good. It's just not
true!

A good black man is a man of his word. He says what he means and means
what he says. His word is his bond.

He never leaves you wondering if he is going to call or show up - he is
dependable. A good black man has a love and a heart for God. As his
relationship and love with and for God grows so will his relationship
and love with and for you grow... Our beautiful black men we salute you,
appreciate you and thank you for whom you are and all you've done.

Pass this along to some of the Good Black Men you know and a few women
that need to read it ... So that they can recognize a good black man.

This poem not only describes every 'Good Black Man' I know ... but also makes me feel very fortunate that I know them!

i like the poem. it's often true that black women overlook the good brother because he doens't look like a movie star. i had a reaction though when i read the poem.

the same poem could be used in response to men who say that there are no good black women. both men and women tend to go for the flashy rather than the trusty. for example, a sister may be overweight and she can't get witness. men and women (ya'll know who you are) keep telling them that they can't find anyone because they're too fat or they need to change. yet sisters are told every day to look past appearances and possessions. when you tell a brother that maybe he should get a better job, or an education, you're being too picky, too elitist and unfair. women are supposed gto look past these faults and understand that racism makes it harder for a black man to get what many of the sisters have. yet noone takes into account that biology, racism and the stress of rising to the occassion has it's effects on black women including weight and what would seem like an overbearing attitude. without that attitude, we wouldn't be finishing college, raising the children alone or handling our business in spite of both racism and sexism. so where's the understanding for what black women must endure? where's the statement about how brothers need to stop chasing good haired light skinned, skinny women who don't value them and find a good black woman, flaws and all?

don't get me wrong. i'm in whole hearted agreement with the poem, but i don't want us to forget that the sentiment goes both ways. everybody needs to rethink their priorities.

quote:

Originally posted by little minx:
i like the poem. it's often true that black women overlook the good brother because he doens't look like a movie star. i had a reaction though when i read the poem.

the same poem could be used in response to men who say that there are no good black women. both men and women tend to go for the flashy rather than the trusty. for example, a sister may be overweight and she can't get witness. men and women (ya'll know who you are) keep telling them that they can't find anyone because they're too fat or they need to change. yet sisters are told every day to look past appearances and possessions. when you tell a brother that maybe he should get a better job, or an education, you're being too picky, too elitist and unfair. women are supposed gto look past these faults and understand that racism makes it harder for a black man to get what many of the sisters have. yet noone takes into account that biology, racism and the stress of rising to the occassion has it's effects on black women including weight and what would seem like an overbearing attitude. without that attitude, we wouldn't be finishing college, raising the children alone or handling our business in spite of both racism and sexism. so where's the understanding for what black women must endure? where's the statement about how brothers need to stop chasing good haired light skinned, skinny women who don't value them and find a good black woman, flaws and all?

don't get me wrong. i'm in whole hearted agreement with the poem, but i don't want us to forget that the sentiment goes both ways. everybody needs to rethink their priorities.

I agree ... for the most part.

But it's also a myth that those of us brothers who are

1. Attractive
2. Well employed
3. Well educated

are having an easy time.

Those of us who don't fit the stereotypes about black men are dealing with a lot of women with 1) low self esteem and 2) ideas about men that have been solidly formed around stereotypes about black men.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: HonestBrother,

I'M AN ELITIST TOO.

Is there anybody that's gettin some? Because that is essnetially what we are talking about right?

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:
Is there anybody that's gettin some? Because that is essnetially what we are talking about right?

Is that what we are talking about?

Getting "some" is easy.

Relationships are not.

You think? Try being in a relationship where you ain't getting any, tell me how easy that is.

I do not understand what the big deal is, I really don't.

What the heck are people looking for that they can not find it.

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:

Is there anybody that's gettin some? Because that is essnetially what we are talking about right?

you're joking, right?

quote:

I do not understand what the big deal is, I really don't.

What the heck are people looking for that they can not find it.

I don't know. Maybe you're not looking for much?

I for one have not found what I'm looking for - which amounts to a great deal more than getting laid.

Let's just leave it at that.

This was a nice poem.

quote:

Originally posted by negrospiritual:

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:

Is there anybody that's gettin some? Because that is essnetially what we are talking about right?

you're joking, right?

No not really. Good sex will keep you balanced and motivated, bad sex will keep you angry, no sex will keep you blind.

Of course it seems like something simple and silly, but because good sex is beyond coitus, you want someone you like being with. Someone you find attractive, someone you spending time with is a pleasure. They do not have to be anything like you, have just enough in common to get you to stay. Everything compromise you make with this person will be based on how you feel about them and getting laid weigh a lot on that (I know getting laid sounds base, but it is a little more intrinsic than coitus, but the coitus should be good).

I mean, have you ever been with someone so long you don't want to touch them? Well how much fun is that? Happy is a helluva thing.

Beautiful poem.

Made me think of what Michelle Obama said today on the Michael Baisden show. . .

When asked, what could she tell us about her husband that folk may not know (or something to that effect)

She responded, he is a good husband & father and he is CONSISTENT.

He does what he says he's going to do, and he is there for the children (always) and he is there for her (always)...

Because of this consistency she trusts him and takes him at his word (or something like that..lol).

I thought it was a beautiful tribute to her husband.

Consistency DOES build trust on so many different levels.

quote:

Originally posted by HonestBrother:

quote:

I do not understand what the big deal is, I really don't.

What the heck are people looking for that they can not find it.

I don't know. Maybe you're not looking for much?

I for one have not found what I'm looking for - which amounts to a great deal more than getting laid.

Let's just leave it at that.

I don't know, you think you know what you want, and the universe will show you what you need and it ain't always the same. But I guess you can go with the manual override, but I don't know why.

That's a really cool poem, but I think the attributes that are mention for a good Black man are the hardest for men to seem to achieve.

Cool poem, it can be easy to overlook the good and only see the bad. Thanks for sharing.

is that you and your honey in the pic? how sweet!

quote:

Originally posted by little minx:
is that you and your honey in the pic? how sweet!

Yup, that's us!

There ARE plenty of good men... they are usually unavailable to older single sisters though... their good qualities being recognized easily.... by good women... early on in their lives...

quote:

Originally posted by Khalliqa:
There ARE plenty of good men... they are usually unavailable to older single sisters though... their good qualities being recognized easily.... by good women... early on in their lives...

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:
You think? Try being in a relationship where you ain't getting any, tell me how easy that is.

I do not understand what the big deal is, I really don't.

What the heck are people looking for that they can not find it.

Amen!